Glowing memories....

IAMB's HS AP Chem recollections brought back memories for me to. Not so much about HS AP Chemistry, which was one of the dullest classes this side of Driver's Ed (sorry, Mom), but his little teaser about sodium brought back to mind a humor piece I remember from Usenet days: the Songs of Cesium, "ancient" odes to that most volatile of elements. A sample

Yesterday

Yesterday,
I had Cesium with which to play.
Now all my fingers have been blown away.
And silence reigns since yesterday.

Suddenly,
I'm just half the man I used to be.
I have no eyes with which to see.
My legs have parted company.

Why she had to blow,
I don't know,
I can only say.
Something went awful wrong,
In the waterbed where we lay.

Yesterday,
Her sky blue path seemed such an easy way.
Now I know there is a price to pay.
Oh, I believed just yesterday.

---Songs of Cesium #117(b)

Fair warning: They're all that bad.